The Catnip
by AnActualBirb
Summary: Avocato had no idea where the plant came from.


Avocato had no idea where The Plant came from. He assumes Gary had gotten it from somewhere and was carrying it around as some sort of emotional support. He only ever saw it when he and Gary were on the 'late night' shift, which were most nights this past week they've been in Final Space. He did not know what kind of plant it was nor where it came from (he assumed Earth though). Gary never spoke about it, and Avocato didn't bring it up.

The small lush green shrub had little pale purple bell like flowers at the end of every other stem. It looked well looked after and it was entirely possible Fox was responsible for that, but it was also entirely possible he was oblivious to it's existence.

It was always placed off centre on the table- a little to the left so they had ample space for cards- and slightly more on Avocato's side (presumably so Gary could have it in his line of sight despite never visually acknowledging it. A human thing or a Gary thing?).

None of this mattered nearly as much as fighting the ridiculously strong urge to rub his face all over it. As things stood he would unconsciously and slowly inch closer, and a little closer. He'd breathe deeper, and a little deeper. The surrounding environment would get juuuust the slightest bit more fuzzy as his focus lazered in on The Plant. Every now and again he would hear Gary snicker, try really hard not to seem startled, and look over to see the human innocently eyeing his cards, almost as focused as Avocato. Sometimes he'd just catch the tail end of Gary's mischievous expression before it disappears.

Avocato's cards totalled 11, "hit me". Gary dealt him another card.

"Stay".

"Stay".

"Blackjack".

Gary theatrically flailed, cards flew everywhere from the stack he had next to him, "dangit! 20, _so clooose!" _he wailed.

"But not quite, baby" Avocato smirked. Half his torso lazed over the table, face resting on his fist, nearly _in _The Plant by this point. He was sure it just came across as being relaxed, perhaps even tired.

Gary groaned like the drama queen he was. "I'm gonna take a whiz," he announced and disappeared out the door.

Avocato eyed The Plant. Then he eyed the door. He shoved his face into it immediately and unceremoniously, inhaling with as much force as ventrixianly possible, frantically and intently attempting to crush the damn thing through his nostrils down into his lungs.

It smelled. _So good._

He didn't notice Gary peering around the door frame, teeth digging into his knuckles to keep from bursting out into laughter. Of course not, Avocato was much too fixed on plastering himself all over the little bush, trying to absorb it into his fur and skin for all it was worth. May they become one and have the universe tremble before their combined power.

"Whatcha-whatcha doin' there buddy?" Gary chortled.

Avocato scrambled to right the plant and _very casually _drape himself oh-so-boredly over his seat. "Oh nothing" He replied as inconspicuously as possible. _Super _lackadaisical. No-thing going on here. Nope.

So of course he jumped about right out of his skin when KVN came barrelling in, all manic energy, with a "ooooh bonding! Can I play? CanIcanIcanI?", and in record time Gary and the robot were grappling over the deck of cards, tumbling over the table, Gary's leg kicking out, the potted plant _flying _off it's stable purchase like it's been rejected and smashing into the floor, effectively destroying all evidence of Avocato's involvement.

This would have solved all of the ventrexian's problems if he didn't immediately _leap _to roll in it.

"Woohoooo!", belted KVN, zipping in circles around the room, Gary valiantly scrambling for purchase in his back "piggy back riiiiides, piggy back riiiiiides, everybody loves piggy back riiiiides", the robot sang jubilantly. Gary responded to this with a myriad of death threats and an impressive amount of vitriol.

Avocato, covered in leaves and soil, eyeballed them from his spot on the floor, head rolling to follow every movement. He got ready, he got into position, he waited for the right moment to strike. KVN zoomed around once, zoomed around twice and as he got to the door Avocato pounced like the big, high-as-a-kite cat-man he was. Gary was ejected off his perch on KVN, Avocato clinged on for dear life and down the hallway on KVN's back he went until they _smacked _right into a wall.

"Oh my crap! Avocato!" Gary screeched with laughter, still trying to catch up. KVN was up immediately and went off to do KVN things, probably. Avocato decided to stay on the floor for now. For a blank metal surface the ceiling sure had some pretty patterns. Was that... Gary's face in the mix there...?

"-catoooo! Hey Avocato!". No it was just his face; half pinched in concern, half in amusement. Avocato focused on him and hummed in acknowledgement. "You're all space-casey there, space cadet", Gary all but snorted.

"Yeah?".

"Yeah".

"Help me off the floor, Gary".

"You got it, chum!". Gary very enthusiastically ripped Avocato from his sweet, sweet equilibrium into a somewhat upright position before declaring "your pupils are stupid dilated".

"Wonder why", Avocato drawled, shooting Gary with A Look.

"No idea what you could possibly insinuating about me there friend-o and quite frankly the _accusation _that I could have _possibly, deliberately _exposed you to a plant wildly known to activate the goof drive in most cats' brains is absolutely _nutcrackers_".

"_Gary..."._

"I _needed _to know what would happen Avocato! I had a mighty need!".

They ended up on the floor again in the conflict that ensued, tumbling up the hallway again ("-just catnit! It was just some catnip, bro!", "-of all the _inconceivably traitorous-"_), Gary clawing to get away ("_-chillax, _enjoy the trip, don't _deprive yourself-", "I'll _deprive _you _of oxygen!"), Avocato hurtling after him, wrestling each other right back to where they started, Gary face-down on the floor, Avocato over his back, weighing him down and gently kind of gnawing on Gary's head ("ouch, ouch, ouch-"). Then he forgot what he was doing.

...Why was he grooming Gary's hair?

"Your hair is _so _golden", he murmured to himself.

"Uh. Why -thank you!" Gary awkwardly responded. Avocato ignored him in favour of running his fingers through it, "so golden," he whispered.

"Getting kinda heavy there, pal," Gary wheezed. Avocato graciously rolled over to lay next to him. Gary poked him ot get his attention and, cheekily, he said: "if I run a piece of string around are you gonna chase it?". In reply Avocato knocked him on the back of the head and sent his face into the floor. Again. "You know, I am in _a lot _more pain than I originally thought I would be!". Avocato responded by running his rough tongue up the side of Gary's face.

"Exactly how high are you right now?".

"Your face is really pink".

"Ah, gotcha".

Avocato had taken to half draping himself over Gary again and they lay there in silence except for the _whap _of the Ventrexian's tail, wildly swishing about and hitting the floor. Gary started running his nails up and down Avocato's spine. There was purring.

"So we're just. Cuddling now. On the cold hard floor. So very cold. So very hard". Gary stated. Avocato just hummed in reply.

"Okay".

**-The Catnip-**

"Owww, my back," Gary groaned, mere minutes later. There were rules about moving a cat that fell asleep on you dammit. _RULES._

"My back is stiff as a board, Avocato. Stiff as a board that's been laying on the hard metal floor for the past ten minutes," he stage whispered. He tried to subtly move only to have Avocato cling to his side harder and growl in his sleep. "Can we at least move to a bed?".

"No," Avocato grouched.

Gary groaned like he was dying. He started pulling on Avocato's ears. "Av-o-cat-o. Avocatooo. Avo. Cato. Mr. Whiskers?".

"Noooo," Avocato moaned.

"Get uuuup".

Gary squished the Ventrexian's face between his hands. He "hmm-unnn"-ed in protest.

"Up. Upsie. Up and at 'em, boy! Wake up, wake up, today's gonna suck!" Gary emphasized each word by lightly slapping Avocato in the face. Avocato, all bleary-eyes, tried his best to send Gary a death glare. He just looked like a big sleepy cat, "'m awake, alright?".

"This is adorable, can we move it somewhere else?".

Avocato pushed himself up and stalked to the kitchen for a glass of milk, grumbling to himself all the way. He jumped nearly to the ceiling when he turned around and there Gary stood, in the doorway. He didn't even hear him follow! This 'catnip' was really making him sluggish now. Gary doubled over, laughing so hard he made no sound at all except for massive gulps of air in between fits.

"Youshouldhaveseenyourface!", _his _face was turning and absolutely _stunning _shade of blue.

"_Since when are you so quiet?" _Avocato hissed, still recovering from the heart-attack^2 he'd just had.

"_I was talking to you the whole time!" _Gary wheezed.

Avocato hesitated. If he'd missed Gary's _constant _jabbering, what else could he have _possibly missed? _Right then and there he decided the only way to know was to go over the entire ship. His expression pinched, his tail swished with concentration and he was off to scrutinize absolutely ev-e-r-y-thing. Gary did his best to follow. At this point he'd forgotten what breathing was even like. "_What in the hell are you doing?" _he gasped. Avocato didn't even hear him.

"Oh. My. Gosh! You keep making these _cat noises!". _Gary would probably pass out soon. There ware fat tears running down his cheeks in rivers. His collar was soaked. He was turning rather purple.

"Gary take a breath, you'll suffocate," Avocato fretted. Gary took a _gargantuan _gulp of air before continuing to absolutely loose his marbles. Avocato was now genuinely concerned for him well-being. This was not a particularly new feeling for him.

"Gary-!".

Gary took another big breath before his whole episode came to an end and left him greedily heaving breaths. Avocato was so tired. "I'm going to bed," he decided.

"You wanna cuddle again?" Gary snorted.

"Hmmm-sure".

"...For realzies? Oh. OH! Time for an epic bro-tonic cuddle sesh, he-allz yeah!"

"Just get over here".

(Of course things can only stay platonic up until the point where your completely stoned friend peppers kisses up and down your neck and absent-mindedly mumbles "love you, man".)


End file.
